Alpha Superwolf

[LoneStar]

Maybe should have called it a Dog instead

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[skyote]

Maybe should have called it a Dog instead

 

[DuckTruck]

Their "launch green" looks pretty sharp.

Ladies and Gentlemen of the Rivian community,

I'm pleased to kick off my new line of amazing vehicles to the world, right here on RivianForums. They're all part of the most incredible transportation company known to mankind. For the first time ever, I'm pleased to introduce this magnificent line of full electric vehicles that the world, no, the entire universe, has yet to experience! These vehicles are not only fully electric, they're full self-driving, full self-charging, and full self-actualizing, all with Asteroid-Proof glass and bodies!

Behold! I introduce to you the Beta Sheep, Sheep+, and SuperSheep!

These vehicles are being made public here, for the first time, against the backdrop of our new parking and roadway surface, made entirely of trees that died a natural death from an over-abundance of carbon in the atmosphere.

These vehicles are so special and efficient that you can get over 7,000 miles on a single charge, all in less than 15 minutes. Best of all, you're able to gain that full charge from the same USB-C charger used for your cell phone or other personal devices, as shown here, on the Sheep, pictured in our Three-Mile Island Radioactive Green Mist foam wrap. It actually glows in the dark!

"Nothing says clean, like glow-in-the-dark green!"

Next is our ultra-modern, two-person Sheep+ in Sunset From Europa Reddish Burnt Orange. The Interior is done in Milky Way Galactica. While the specks appear to be dust-like against the backdrop of Deep Space, they are actually a reproduction of our home galaxy as hand-painted by an actual T.V. Astrophysicist, by the initials of N.D.T. The steering wheel is actually embossed with hand-inlayed Sterling Silver-like paint.

And last, but not least, is our five-row, seventeen passenger Luxurotransporter Model of the SuperSheep, in White As Seagull-ible matted finish. It's as though the Seagulls themselves loved it so much, they laid down their own deposit. The look alone causes many an onlooker to exclaim, "Wow, that's really Progressive!"

We know you'd love to see the interior of this Spacecraft-On-Earth, but we've engaged our unique "Darth Vader Shader" glass technology so as not to over-share everything ahead of our upcoming BlastOff, scheduled to take place in early December (year TBD).

Although we're currently spending all of our time, resources, and energy developing the tremendous technology behind these incredible vehicles, our Marketing Department was still able to craft the following video to show off all of our achievements to date (following this amazing video is a sneak-peek at our upcoming retro-line versions of all three Beta vehicles from our Ansel Adams collection).

The Ansel Adams Collection

For those of you lucky enough to become early adopters of the Beta Lifestyle, not only will you be able to make a $10,000 semi-refundible deposit on the Beta vehicle(s) of your choice, but you'll also have the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to join in the soon-to-be-revealed SPAC, ahead of it going both public and sky-high. Don't be the one who missed the chance to be taken for a ride!

Call 1-800-GULLIBLE today for a full prospectus of this offer, along with the upcoming SEC pleadings. (offering underwritten by Dewey, Cheatham, and Howe, a fully delisted company).

 

[SeaGeo]

Is that an Australian accent? I thought EVs were illegal in Australia.

 

[Ladiver]

@DuckTruck I've sent my deposit!

 

[skyote]

@DuckTruck , you missed your calling as an author & comedian. Your commitment and execution are on point.

 

[huskylord]

The two dudes in the video look like they should have a magic act in Vegas instead of debuting an EV truck.

 

[DuckTruck]

@DuckTruck I've sent my deposit!

That's great news! I forgot to mention that for those wanting in on the SPAC, there's a discount for using cash in unmarked bills. Please don't send it via USPS. FEDEX/UPS recommended, bicycle courier preferred. Personal message for bag drop info. ?

 

[DuckTruck]

@DuckTruck , you missed your calling as an author & comedian. Your commitment and execution are on point.

Thanks, Skyote. That put a smile on my face, all before 9 in the morning! ?

BTW, the desk-top studio should serve as proof that I actually do go into my office frequently. Just because our office sounds like a noisy car (that will end soon), the beach, or an airport when you call is just further proof that insurance is a noisy business.

 

[DuckTruck]

I think their effort is going to be to be as inexpensive as possible while having a certain look. The specs are not competitive, but they are sufficient for most use, and while it's not a quad-motor tank-turning rubber-melting five-ton-hauling glass-roofed premium-sound Alexa-flirter, the lighter weight and so smaller and cheaper battery pack should make it more palatable for what it is, which will be to keep the deliverable toy count low, mount a cell phone on the dash for all your non-immediate driving needs, and offer a lot of custom-fit money-making extras.

Thrill,

That was a mouthful, but well-stated. Something like this would certainly have a market, if it truly sees the light of day. I was spoofin' it with my Beta lineup because even the car mags seem uncertain as to the possibility of it coming to fruition. I think that the Nikola and Lordstown stories are taking a toll on the expectations of viability for what were promising-looking prospects.

RJ and Rivian found an untapped niche and brought together the funding, vision, and great people to fill the slot they actually created. The serendipity of finding the plant when shopping for machinery is one of those difference-making dreams you hear of from time to time. I hope Alpha has, or finds some of that same magic to help grow and drive the EV movement forward.

Again, we shall see.....

 

[DuckTruck]

More reviews wondering if this thing's real or not:

https://www.google.com/amp/s/jalopn...ool-electric-truck-that-i-hope-1847554920/amp

Other sites out there also touting a real model is heading to the Petersen Automotive Museum in L.A.

There are some fun comments here from Jalopnik regarding how apparent staffing issues may impact production.

That said, if this thing actually makes it to production, I'm sure it'll have a solid following. I'm guessing that everyone here is pulling for EV's to make it big, no matter who might make them.

 

[DuckTruck]

@DuckTruck I've sent my deposit!

Ladiver,

Thank you. It just arrived. I didn't think you'd take me seriously on the bike courier. Lots of smoke between L.A. and Portland. The $20 tip didn't create the level of joy I was hoping for. Go figure! Now begins their long ride home....

Not to push my luck, but you're certain none of those bills are marked, right? The used McDonald's sack was a nice touch! The SPAC will be announced shortly after production ramps up. That is not an untruthful statement. ?

 

[Ladiver]

Ladiver,

Thank you. It just arrived. I didn't think you'd take me seriously on the bike courier. Lots of smoke between L.A. and Portland. The $20 tip didn't create the level of joy I was hoping for. Go figure! Now begins their long ride home....

Not to push my luck, but you're certain none of those bills are marked, right? The used McDonald's sack was a nice touch! The SPAC will be announced shortly after production ramps up. That is not an untruthful statement. ?

Thanks for the confirmation. All bills were freshly laundered to make sure all marks were gone.

 

[DuckTruck]

Alpha Motor Corporation Used Baristas to Introduce Wolf Electric Truck Mockup
29 Aug 2021, 17:56 UTC · By Gustavo Henrique Ruffo

https://www.autoevolution.com/news/...roduce-wolf-electric-truck-mockup-168280.html

 

[Gearhead500]

Alpha Motor Corporation Used Baristas to Introduce Wolf Electric Truck Mockup
29 Aug 2021, 17:56 UTC · By Gustavo Henrique Ruffo

https://www.autoevolution.com/news/...roduce-wolf-electric-truck-mockup-168280.html

That reads like a soap opera and not in a good way.
#TrainWreck

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